Rap News 14: Higgs Boson Unbound [Track+Video]

Juice Rap News are a duo from Melbourne, Australia, who have been making a name for themselves online, by producing music videos which not only entertain, but also educate and create dialogue too.

Hugo Farrant and Giordano Nanni produce hip hop parody music videos, which are presented by UK-native, Farrant, posing as news anchorman Robert Foster, while he also plays the part of the many high profile guests which are featured. Nanni is the main writer who is “responsible for the critiques and philosophies explored”, and boy do they explore a lot of areas. Subjects covered include political and social issues, freedom, war, economics and human rights.

Recently, they have made some waves with a handful of episodes which supported Wikileaks and Julian Assange, and on many of their videos they are critical of American foreign policy, but this video is about something completely different – the search for the ‘God Particle’ – the so-called Higgs Boson. Prepare to be entertained, and to possibly learn something at the same time…


Rap News 14: Higgs Boson Unbound

You can keep up to date with Juice Media’s ‘Rap News’ show on their website, plus follow them on YouTube, Facebook, Twitter and Reverb Nation. Juice Rap News is licensed under a Creative Commons license, and you can help to fund the continuing creation of new episodes by donating a few bucks.


Hello, Internet! It’s Rap News with a brand new edition set
to present views and events in this grand human experiment.
And this week we hear of some hugely significant developments
in the search for the ultimate origin of life, the universe and everything.

Indeed, this evening we’re receiving the very latest prophecy,
direct from the top physicists in Switzerland at the CERN laboratory,
who are now about to come out with a major announcement about a tiny discovery:
welcome, Doctor Scott Ripley. – Robert, thanks for having me.

- Will you make a statement? – This is an epic win!
After decades examining the Standard Model to explain everything
we finally know what gave mass to all the crap in the universe,
This is the big-bang climax to all of our huge research.

- It certainly seems to have caused Mass-debating…
- Can you blame us? We had a hard-on for the Hadron as a way to connect with
our Makers, the Quantum Mechanics; our MASSters.
We followed the signs they left us: leptons, photons and quasars.

Big things have small beginnings, and we’re getting close to getting answers to our questions
Today’s advances could be the key to unlocking the cosmos and its vast dimensions
Our inner-space-ship, the Large Hadron Collider, will take us higher
than Mount Olympus, where we’ll finally grab and acquire the divine fire….

- What answers do we require? – Well, listen closely
we’ve spent four decades of intense focus, travelling deep into this ocean
patiently thawing out the intricate coding that’s been frozen,
all because our storyline was missing a key particle component

To explain how it all holds together for more than a slim moment
without which there’d be no planets, galaxies, life, just endless chaotic motion
so we recreated the prime explosion, eventually exposing
The prophesied and postulated, legendary Higgs boson

- What people call the “God Particle’!?
- Oh, Science, don’t call it that, you fool
Our holy boson is not like God at all.
That’s heretical. God doesn’t exist, he’s invisible, and theoretical

We have evidence: at the level of 5 sigmata, forget these cults!
We’ve found the Mass-iah! And Genesis; come and check our results
in the mass region of a hundred and twenty six gigaelectronvolts!
- So can we see this remarkable object in the depth of your vaults?

- Errrr…. no. None can see it with their mortal eyeball,
only in our mighty temple can we detect its presence passing before
it decays and dies to give life, sacred mass, to us all.
- We stand in awe; but tell us: what is it all for?

- Various practical functions: interstellar travel could become like grabbing a cab at a junction
or we could always make a brand new weapon of MASS destruction.
- Actually, I meant, what is our overall purpose though,
as a civilisation what is it we’re searching for? – I’dunno.

- Is this Big Bang story our creation myth to believe in?
- Don’t take the piss! myth? stop behaving like a heathen in this age of reason, bitch!
- But what was there before this Boson came around?
- Silly Robert! Everyone knows by now: It’s turtles all the way down.

- Thanks, Professor, for coming in this momentous evening
to tell us about anti-matters of Life, the Universe and Everything
to explain clearly the latest theories in our grand quest for meaning
in which we attempt to tell ourselves what’s Real and what’s Dreaming

Isn’t it easy to forget, as our Odyssey continuously unfolds
that the answers which the Universe eventually elects to disclose
appear to depend entirely on the Questions we pose?
…That’s it for the show. See you all for more next episode.